Why do many
people continuously get trapped in the vicious
circle of relationships based on infatuation? It
is simple: they do not love themselves, and
therefore they are willing to forfeit their
individuality, including their wants and needs,
just to have somebody in their life.
The degree to which you love yourself is the
degree to which you will be able to extend love
to others, and inevitably to find the one for
you.
Do you extend as much kindness to yourself, as
you do to others?
Do you love yourself?
Take a few moments. Ponder these questions
carefully and soulfully.
Look at the second question again. Are you
guilty of giving up time with friends and family
- or, perhaps more importantly, giving up the
pursuit of your dreams -- for the sake of
another? If this is you, don't panic or feel
bad: you are not alone. Millions of people are
in this vicious circle. The good news is that
you can change, reverse this pattern, and move
from a vicious circle into a loving circle.
Don't know where to begin?
Let me provide the "Circle of Love" road map, so
you can recognize the road signs on your path to
love.
It all starts with you. You are the center of
your "Circle of Love".
Finding the right person with whom to share your
life is not the first focus of loving. The
primary focus is how you live your daily life:
it's developing your capacity for loving
yourself, so that you may better love those
around you. It all centers on you. On a daily
basis, increase the love you give to yourself.
Be kind and loving to you. Start doing things
for you. This is not being selfish: this is an
act of self-love. You will be amazed how your
new attitude towards giving and receiving love
returns to you.
Love extended to others in a healthy way is like
the knowledge that a teacher shares with his or
her students. At the end of the class, the
teacher retains the knowledge and the students
have gained the knowledge. Love is like the
teacher's knowledge in that it should be shared,
not given away at one's own expense. The more
you share love, the more love you will gain.
There is a world of difference between the
person who possesses self-love and the person
who does not. The former is truly giving in
sharing love with others, whereas the latter is
not. It all starts with loving yourself: this
will allow you to give a more enriched love to
others. Once you reach this point, your Circle
of Love will expand.
Within an expanded Circle of Love, you will be
able to extend, attract, and recognize committed
love. Once you have the committed love you seek,
you can rise to new levels of love in your life.
Love's Journey is an endless road, and your
Loves' Circle just keeps getting bigger.
Erich Fromm in his book, The Art of Loving,
described love as an art that requires patience,
confidence, discipline, concentration, faith and
practice daily. Today, more than ever, knowledge
and skills are required to master The Art of
Loving.
Your life and the lives of those you love are
happening now. Your life today is not a dress
rehearsal for another life you will have
later... Live it with love now.